Its been interesting to see what people are doing for Christmas this year. Really, its the perfect year to say “fuck-it” and not do Christmas or at least do something completely non-traditional. Our family went to Hawaii five years ago for Christmas. As a Mom, it was glorious! No baking, cooking, shopping, decorating, cleaning, shuttling from one gathering to another. However, the day of Christmas, even with the girls sitting on Santa’s knee by the pool and the last Butterball Turkey roll we could find in Kona, a bit of the magic was definitely missing, especially for the girls.
This year something came over me and I became completely Christmas obsessed. I started shopping in October! I usually wait until half the gifts don’t arrive on time. Of course, there is always the 800 text messages from grandparents and auntie and uncle wondering what to get the girls, to which I reply, “they are 18 and 16 and have phones – ask them yourself!” Then there is my Dad who has me do his shopping every year for my Mom. I do have fun with his credit card – haha!
Yesterday I was texting with a friend and I was telling her I didn’t know what had gotten into me this year. I also remarked how I was completely exhausted and I had no idea how my Mom pulls off what she does every single year. Christmas is perfect. Their home is so cozy and beautiful at the lake, all of our favourite treats meticulously on a beautiful plate when we arrive, gifts wrapped with the most beautiful bows, and the smell of onions frying in butter. That is a true sign and smell of Christmas in our family.
This year so much has been taken away. A lot has been gained too. However, for us, it was extra hard with losing our daughters big graduation and all that goes with that. I lost my grandmother. I lost a business dream. But like I said, so much was gained and realized in these times as well. So I think Christmas for me this year, has been about creating magic and joy and being able to at least control what happens in our little family and home.
I used to balk at my Mom for going so crazy at Christmas. Mostly for our family, its about the food! She spends hours creating our favourites. Ukrainians we are so the perogies and cabbage rolls are a must. Then is her secret butter tart recipe and the girls request for peanut butter balls and toffee bark. This year, I had to buck up and do it myself. I was so out of practice and nothing quite tastes as good as when Mom does it.
My brother out in Ontario is doing the same as I am – baking and cooking up all of our childhood favourites. They were going to come after Christmas but with all the lockdowns (they are in a full-lock down again now) and the risks of carrying the virus to my parents, they decided against it. Our hearts hurt as its been a year and a half without seeing them.
My Mom, brother and I have a text thread 10 miles long with her giving us tips and instructions on how to get our favourites just the way she makes them. Its been really fun. But after I finished making buns (which were a bit of a disaster), she said, “I’m feeling sad, you and your brother don’t need me anymore”. I replied that of course we do! She should be proud of herself that she has created such joy through food and traditions and that she has taught us and now they have become such special traditions for our own families.
My husband had the brunt of kitchen clean-up duty last weekend and by Saturday night with one more dog-walk to do, he said, “My feet hurt and I just want to sit down!” I almost smacked him upside the head! I said, “Dude – I’ve been doing this for a month now plus 10km of dog walks each day – suck it up!”
Anyway, my Christmas epiphany was this: As much of a pain in the ass Christmas is, there is so much love and gift within the making of it, something I don’t think I realized until this year. Don’t get me wrong, its fucking hard work, but this year it feels so much more joyful. The gift is in the memories and carrying on traditions for our kids. Its been really special this year.
It will be interesting to look back on this post next year. To see where we’ve “returned to”. I definitely hope that we return to some normalcy by then. I really miss people. I’m an extroverted introvert – but my extroverted self needs some people exposure. I also hope we keep some of what we have learned this year. I said to my daughter yesterday, what I have enjoyed the most is not having all the Christmas and Holiday “stuff” that you are only obligated to do, especially the staff parties! haha! I hope we all remember next year to slow down again. To remember what’s truly important.
Whatever you and your families choose to do this COVID-Christmas, I hope its joyful, magical and safe. While I don’t think the first half of 2021 is going to be a whole lot different, the end is in sight. Soon, we can connect face to face again. The hugs will feel so good.
I’d love to hear what you have planned! Comment below and share your COVID-Christmas happenings.
Beautiful Memories
Merry Christmas Everyone!
xoxo
~Olivia