What the hell is happening to me and why did no one warn me?

The past few years I’ve been seeing some changes in myself. We all joke about age and turning 40 but seriously, why does no one warn you about this shit? Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of awesome things about entering your 40s. Everyone says that your “give a fuck facto” drops to almost zero. This is true! The only thing with that is you wish you had developed this talent in your 20s. Why does wisdom comes so late?

The parts that suck are ageing and hormones. I’ve heard that for some women, the 10 years leading up to menopause can be effortless. This was the case for my mom. But for others, it can be a living hell. It appears I am in that category. The more I research, it seems that for very active woman, this phase of life can be torture. For me, my hormones are starting to seriously interfere with my active lifestyle and I’ve had enough.

I may be getting older but I am not old nor do I intend to “get old”. How does that saying go – you’re only as old as you act? I definitely have a lot of adventuring left. I don’t intend to sit still until I’m literally forced to. However, I’m quickly learning that a woman that has to battle hormones while trying to improve athletic performance can quickly spiral into insanity.

Normally this is the part where we would say, ok gents, stop reading. We are about to get into the gory details of being female. You know, the other 50 plus percent of the population. However, I think men should not shy away from these things. As a personal trainer who has worked with primarily women, male trainers who work with women also need to know how hormones and cycles affect us and our performance. This starts in puberty and doesn’t stop basically until we die. As I find myself bitching to my husband time and time again, “when is the last time you had to plan your activities around your period?” Also, I haven’t researched divorce rates correlating to menopause – but it might be a thing.

Over the past two years, I’ve entered into the stage of peri-menopause as have many of my friends. At least we have each other to complain to, yet none of us seem to have any answers. So to keep our sanity, we joke about the crazy. But its time to get serious. We really shouldn’t have to feel like this in this day and age.

For me, my symptoms are many. Insomnia, night-sweats – to the point where my husband says – the bed has to “dry out” before its made after I’ve been up twice to change in the middle of the night. Low energy, inability to focus for long periods of time. Bitchiness, I can only assume is due to feeling like a tired slug all the time. Then there is the heavy periods that never end. So with all of this going on, it leaves me with very few days in a month where I feel I can go out and so something “really hard” physically. I’ve also noticed my collagen disappearing. This is not good for the ego or self-esteem. Things are sagging… my face and my belly especially. We go through all we have to as females and then everything just “gives in”.

‘Listen Buddy! After the hot flushes I’ve been having this is like a resort!’

I’ve now met with my GP and the “solutions” are as follows: a low-dose birth control pill, an IUD, a prescription of tranexamic acid and the more invasive option, an ablation and tubal ligation. To me, the first three are just “cover-ups” to mask what is really going on. The ablation is what I am currently considering, but it is invasive, comes with its own set of risks and requires a few weeks of downtime. DOWN-TIME! (insert that emoji with the hands on face).

Now I am no medical professional of any type and I really do have the BEST GP but I still don’t know what to do. The fact is I’m dealing with two issues: 1. Extremely low ferritin levels due to blood loss. 2. Hormonal hell that is turning me bat-shit crazy. It just seems there has to be a better way. I really don’t want to try birth control. I did that in my early 20s and I got bloated with 10 pounds of extra water weight and I think my husband slept with one-eye opened just incase. I tried an IUD but had never ending spotting until six months later I had it taken out. The IUD also caused 10 pounds of water weight gain.

I have seen a naturopath for many years as well. I am taking supplements to assist in hormonal balance. I know they are doing their job because without them, I turn into a whole new level of crazy. The problem with the natural route is that its costly and very “labour intensive”. You have to make a concerted effort to remember to take this in the morning, that in the evening and those can’t be taken together and so on and so forth.

So being the relentless research nerd that I am, I started coming across several websites of women who had gone through the same thing but didn’t accept a cover-up as an option. Women who are athletes and have made it their mission to find answers and help other women who want to stay active and keep PROGRESSING their performance well into their 50s and beyond. I’m just at the tip of the iceberg here but came across Dr. Stacey Sims wesbite. That also led me to her Facebook page, which then led me to her TED talk, which literally had me sobbing. I’m not kidding. I was sobbing. Finally, someone who fucking gets it!!! So I’m going to take her next course. I have a lot of items on my bucket list and I do not want to have hormones holding me back.

Tomorrow, I also have a consult with a female sports medicine doctor who also looks specifically at hormones and endocrinology in female athletes. I contacted her a few weeks ago to ask her if she worked with 40+ recreational athletes, the “weekend-warrior” types – haha! She said she indeed did! I will admit I’ve felt “unworthy of her time” since I’m not planning on climbing Everest or trying out for any Olympic team any time soon. Thankfully, that don’t give a fuck factor kicked-in and I decided I was indeed worth it.

I’ll keep you posted on my journey through hell. Hopefully its just a small blip and I will be raring to go by the time the snow melts.

Have hormones affected you? Interfered with living to your fullest potential? Drop me a comment. I’d love for women (and men) to connect and share their stories.

Until next time! xo ~Olivia

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